A Wish...

A Friend Far Away...

Together But Alone...

I really fell interested in these lines of Khalil Gibran...

The Little Traveller In Me

Today is September 27th; World Tourism Day.....

Life is monotonous without travel...To move from our place to some exquisite place for a sojourn...We must walk on that unknown soil, relishing the weather of the place, scorched by their sun, inhaling deir air, nourishing deir sweet water, enjoying the smells of the place, tasting it's food delicacies and mingling with the people of the place. Even the idea is rejuvenating...

Travel tempers man...make him broad-minded to accept different kinds of people as they are...
It is like taking a deep dive into life which lulls before us with lot of experiences and possibilities...It teaches us the value of life ...Life is not jst about existing...it is a symbiosis...it is a process of give and take...where we learn a lot of vital lessons of survival by coexisting...

Thus travel is a pursuit...a pursuit of a long cherished goal...in d midst of which many difficulties can arise...success is in overcoming d obstacles and reaching the destination.
Thus going on a journey enlivens ur spirit and rekindles our soul. To set about your dream journey is a blessing...Bcoz inside every human being there is a  thirsty unquenched traveller...who aims at distant destinations...

Truth...

Hurt Dat I Found In Me Today...Deep Inside...

What She Wrote...

My Friend...

Missing Someone...

Childhood I Lived Through...

The memories of a treasured childhood
Has rotten under the weight of the thousand memories placed over it...
Good and bad; grim and gay

Reminiscences of the rainy mornings
When daylight was just peeping out too slow,
All faded images flood and fleet behind my closed eyes
The long slender legs on pedals of the bicycle
Making way to the tuitions and den to the school
With thick long hair plated and tied in knots
On both sides of the head
Clad in neatly ironed uniform, school tie and shoes
With an innocent sweet face, knowing nothing of the atrocities of the world I live in
Inhaling the cool crisp air of the foggy morning

Adieu, to that pleasant childhood that made ME
Now only one me exists
And that is the one that stands perplexed
Amidst the real life ahead of me and
The unreal world that unfolds before me
Shoud I hide behind the bushes of unseen virtuality
Or should I face the thorns of the imminent reality...
I know not...

Summoned to be a Poet

How long can I lament...

How long
can I lament
with this depressed
heart and soul

how long
can I remain
a sad autumn
ever since my grief
has shed my leaves

the entire space
of my soul
is burning in agony

how long can I
hide the flames
wanting to rise
out of this fire

how long can one suffer
the pain of hatred
of another human
a friend behaving like an enemy

with a broken heart
how much more
can I take the message
from body to soul

I believe in love
I swear by love
believe me my love

how long
like a prisoner of grief
can I beg for mercy

you know I'm not
a piece of rock or steel
but hearing my story
even water will become
as tense as a stone

if I can only recount
the story of my life
right out of my body
flames will grow

                          --Jalal ed-Din Rumi 

Onam Season Ends Thus...

Every Onam is special...Enjoyed it well...Eagerly waiting for many more beautiful celebrations...

Pulikkali...The Parade Of Tigers in Multicolors...

This Pulikkali, which is conducted on the fourth day of Onam festival...is a unique custom of Thrissur...mostly that makes Thrissur famous...Men with huge bellies, with the image of Puli(Tiger) painted on their bodies in different colors...parade through the Thrissur Round dancing to the rhythm of music...with thousands of people buzzing around with curious eyes to watch the beautiful sight...This time women are also allowed to parade as Tigers...So it is special this time...

Early Morning Walks...A Revitalizing Experience...

Today, as I am able to walk on my on, and as almost a month of immobility gave me a strong desire to move on with a new venture...I wanted to free myself completely from the shackles of inactivity... So I decided upon a new routine...Walking...

I am not supposed to overstrain my leg. So I decided to take a short walk...slow...but my aim was to fix it as a routine. Today was the first day...Evry long journey of a thousand miles begin with a single step. So today I did put my best foot forward towards the aim of acquiring a healthy body...

I woke up at 5.45; brushed, changed to my track pants and Tshirt and got out of my house at 6.15. Took only a walk of 25 minutes today...as my legs have to still get used to the new conditions...

Today was very fresh and vibrant...I think, the sweet morning air outdoors, which I inhaled has worked wonders for me...filling me with lot of energy and vitality...I was more active and cool...such stimulating was my experience today...

Health is Freedom...Health Is Wealth...

I became free today...free from insufficiency...free from immobility...free from inactivity...free from sympathy of others...above all...free from boredom...Today September 16th Friday...is the day when the plaster taped around my fractured left leg was cut open...drilled and chiseled out, actually. This ends one month of inactivity and uncertainty. Tomorrow I will go back to office once again...

It is when I was made to sit down like this for quite some time, that, I was made aware of how lucky we all are...to be healthy...Even when we r brimming with all energy nd goodness...wht spurs us ahead is our good health and well-being. The promptness to attempt new things and readiness  to complete the tasks we undertook...for each of these the source of energy comes from a healthy mind...A healthy mind resides only in a healthy body...Any kind of threat to our physical well-being greatly obstructs free thinking. It is our thoughts that lay foundation to our our actions. What we think today is what we execute tomorrow...

But we don't realise the value of health until we lose it...I did not have a hint of it until I was trapped thus in disguise of a leg-fracture. Now that  I came to realise this...I take this opportunity to thank the Almighty, for the healthy life he has bestowed upon me...Thank you God...Health Is Wealth...So all of U...Stay Healthy...

Life Is Also About Friendship...

We would have lot of people around us, who love us...who shape us...who are our life and blood...Our Parents, our Spouse, our Children, our Grandparents...Their interests, needs, passions... all form the most important part of our life...But there is always some thing else...that add flavour to our life....It is friendship...

This is a beautiful poem on friendship by Moylom enterprises....

I dedicate it to my best friend who always enliven my spirits even when I am down and desperate...

Finding strength in friendship

In the silence
When I can’t hear your voice
I try to imagine the direction
I should look to find you.

I’m not great
With such spacial orientations.
North,  South,  East, West?
They all seem to leave me puzzled.

But somehow, without fail,
I seem to find your heart
Because you are searching
For mine too.

Your soul reaches over
The many obstacles
Which others find daunting
And it finds mine.

I keep thinking
One day your eyes
Would dig too deep
And see unsightly parts of me,

And just like that
Your soul would finally stop
Searching for mine
And disappear into the shadows.

So I try to think of reasons
You shouldn’t look so closely,
But you’re not the superficial type
You live for depth, you’re not afraid.

You don’t mind getting messy
And it amazes me
That you aren’t deterred
By the state of my garden.

You’re willing to help me
Till the stubborn soil
To soften and mulch,
To plant new seeds of love.

Like the seasons
My Spring will soon come.
And hopefully,  those seeds
Will bloom into something wonderful.

So I hope you’ll stick around
To bear witness to your handiwork,
To see how much I’ve grown
Because of you.

Happy Onam...

Onam is a beautiful festival. I will call it a festival of unity and togetherness...All those who loves you and values you by heart visits you and those who are too far away calls you over the phone...To hear the voices of our loved ones is indeed a tingling sensation...

Feasting together is another beautiful and exciting feeling that holds relations together...Also to feast in plantain leaves and eating your heart out, clad in our very new Onapudavas, feasting on your favourite dishes sitting squatted down on the floor...eating rice mixed with sambar, licking the mango pickle, with papad steamed banana, upperi and kootukaris, aviyal, thoran, kaalan, olan...sipping the hot steaming payasam...and many more...

Thus Onam is more than a festival, a great feeling...a much awaited moment...a long cherished dream come true...

Thrikkakkarappan... Uthradam Special...

BEHIND THE MYTH:

A clay pyramid structure with four faces and a flat top used during Onam celebrations symbolizes Thrikkakara Appan or Thrikakkarappan. This unique structure represents Vamana, an incarnation of Lord Vishnu. For some people the pyramid represents both King Maveli and Vishnu. It is also referred as Onathappan. Thrikkakarappan is the presiding deity in the famous Thrikakkara temple in Ernakulam District of Kerala and is closely associated with the Onam myth.

It is believed that Vamana had sent Mahabhali to Patalam at Trikkakara. The place where the holy feet (Trikkal) of Vishnu touched came to be known as Trikkalkara. This later became Thrikkakara.

According to Onam Story and popular belief, Lord Vishnu in his Vamana Avatar unjustly pushed King Mahabali into the netherworld or pathalam. But Lord Vishnu granted King Bali the boon to visit his subjects once in a year. It is also believed that King Bali got ‘Vishnu sayujyam’ or reached the Vaikunta. Due to this both King Mahabali and Lord Vishnu in the Vamana avatar are welcomed during Onam. This makes Onam a unique festival in which the victor and the vanquished are both worshipped.

Thrikkakara Appan structure is made using clay or mud and generally it has four faces with a flat top. In some places the structure is in the shape of a cone. Nowadays ready-made Thrikakkarappan structures are available for sale during Onam festival.

While welcoming King Mahabali to the homes, people place Thrikkakara Appan on a bed made of rice flour and is decked with flowers and pujas are performed. It is also placed along with the Athapookalam – the special floral arrangement done during Onam.

Some people believe that the unique shape of Thrikkakara Appan – the four faces – represents the four stages in the life of a man.

Usually, people place three structures which represent the three steps of land asked by Vamana to King Mahabali.

Together again...

Love Bitten...

Love Is Beautiful In Silence...

Unperturbed In The Eye Of The Cyclone...

"Live in the midst of the battle of life. Anyone can keep calm in a cave or when asleep. Stand in the whirl and madness of action and reach the Centre. If you have found the Centre, you cannot be moved".

The above are the words of Swami Vivekananda...Life is indeed a battlefield. We have three options to choose frm. Either we can renounce the material pleasures of life, or live with the flow of life accepting what comes, or stand up for our principles and fight...

Most of us would lik the idea of fight to uphold our principles...but the initial enthusiasm wud wither in the time being, due to the lack of stigma... Excitement is not enough...but best of all one must have the ability to keep calm...move through the storm nonchalant... U r an instant success if u can stand in d midst of the whirl, unmoved and thus find the centre of it. Den u r safe forever...no one can touch u now...To attain this tranquility in the midst of pandemonium is the real courage...real stability...

Missing...as Neruda see it...

Between Life And Death...

My grandmother almost passed away today...She is about 94 and is bed-ridden. She has to be washed, feed and kept clean by us. But however she ate well and never showed any signs of uneasiness until evening, when she had a  tasty cup of tea and went on to an evening slumber.

As amma moved across the room to clean the bathroom, the till-then peacefully sleeping grandmother suddenly was tossing and turning in her bed. Sound was not coming out of her throat and she was trying to inhale with difficulty...Her eyes began to reel and face turned pale. All uncles, aunties and close neighbours were called in. We wiped her face with water and gave her some tender coconut water to drink. She gulped only a few spoons of it. Her body began to feel ice cold and hands were stiff.

She began to produce strange sounds and with her till- then-numb hands pointed to one direction as if she saw someone calling her from that point. We all turned our heads to see who was there, but found none. Old folk gathered there,  who had seen many deaths, said: "It's almost over. Pray for her soul. Inform the relatives..."
My mother and me began to cry aloud...me calling out involuntarily 'Achammeee' at the top of my voice.
Suddenly an old chechi held my hand.
She told me:
" Don't call her aloud...The soul can't go then...Don't cry or make any noise, it will intimidate the soul from ascending to heaven. Please don't stop her...Let her get a peaceful death".

But the pressure of the situation and the tremor in the pit of my stomach, gave me away...As I wailed,  her voices stopped, she turned her face to respond to our sound, her eyes became normal... Gradually the harsh uneasy breathing also returned to normalcy; body became warm again. She slowly got back to a peaceful sleep with regular rhythms of heartbeat.Things came back to what was before and the crowd  around her dispersed one by one...

In the moments of her discomfort, I had fixed in mind, that we are going to lose her. She is ending up her ties with this earthly life. No more are we relatives. She is going to be just a soul,  free frm the tangles of her sensual body...She is being liberated from the material life and is exalted to the divine sphere. She would soon be judged in the divine space equating her good and bad deeds in  the weighing scale of justice.

What is Life and death? It is a conundrum...an all time wonder ...How ephemeral is the life we live...All ends, the very momnt breathe goes out of our body. How much do we boast about our skills and adventures and melt in the euphoria of our glories...forgetting the imminent,  inevitable death...

Happy Birthday To Me

Good Times And Bad Times

When difficulties arise, from out of nowhere, when endurance becomes tough, we say or atleast fix in our minds, that it is the arrival of the bad times. When you win a lucky dip, or get some unexpected money, when unexpectedly, all cards fit in, and things begin to turn in your favour, u call it Good time. The stars are shining bright on u...

But I feel dat der is nothing good or bad, it is our thought...Actually consulting the stars....this is the bright time for me...say all stars are in favour...but see how I am stumped...tied up in d bed, keeping aside the thousands of things that urgently needs to be done, losing the celebrations, festivals and even deprived of a peaceful birthday ...Today I got shivering fever, running nose and pricking headache...diseases which I never had for ages...
and still it is entitled to b d best time in my life...

But I have taught my mind to be strong, to be positive...never to loose out of my grip...I don't say I enjoy the fits of fever or spasms of headache...but evry moment I lie down on my bed with closed eyes...I try to transcend to the depths of my mind... hallowing deep into the bottom...I say, it is full of peace there... tranquility...And I bet, it is quite a feeling...

Attha Chamayam

Today was Attham, as per Malayalam Calendar. And that is a very special day in Kerala...It was always so exciting to put the Poookkalam...To welcome the Great Old King Mahabali...His annual visit to see his countrymen...beautiful is the legend as well as the custom...Very eager to celebrate Onam...The season of the bounty... greenery everywhere...birdsongs echoing all over...floral designs in the verandah...big smiles adorning the faces of everyone...New costumes...Sadhya...kaikottikaali...Vallom kali...Pulikkali...The days of festivities are here...

Everything We Got In Life Is A Gift So Wonderful...

Today after many days of bed-rest, I was allowed to set my foot on the ground. It was painful to do so in the beginning...but later on I got used to walking slowly with the heavy plaster on the foot.

In the evening, I took a stroll around my garden. I felt the day much brighter than ever before...I was seeing everything in a new light...The blue sky...how pleasing it is just to gaze and gaze and absorb the depths of it....the cool breeze...how soothing it feels on my supple skin...the pitter patter of a slow rain...how rejuvenating is the affect of the water  drops dropping on us...the colorful butterflies...how lovely they are as they toss about from one flower to another to form a perfect background to a cozy evening...the twitter of birds...how sweet to the ears as they chatter and return to deir nests...the soil where I set my foot on...how natural it feels too walk bare-footed on the ground..sensing the vibrations of the Mother Earth...How beautiful is the crimson colour of the setting sun...Haven't I noticed dem before!!!...

They have all been there even before... But in my hectic schedules,I forgot...no I terribly failed to look at the beauties of the eternal creations of the Creator...I forgot to remember the power of his Magic Wand...on the waving of which he can do miracles in our lives...

Thus, this break, in my life, is a blessing in disguise...which granted me some time to admire and appreciate the wonders that the Almighty has set before my  eyes...Great is his Power...Magnanimous is his love...I experience it...and bow to the Omnipotent Omniscient Creator...

She who betrayed the laws of sanctity

Listening to the music of the rain, watching the crystal beads of water from the heavens, tht drop s down to purge men from the bounds of earthly evils, my mind was transported to an instance narrated to me by a friend of mine-- a story of sin. My friend is a social worker who had easy access to all walks of the society...say the creamy high class level and the down-trodden low class.

Being a person in power, and entitled to social reforms, he was assigned this herculean task of evacuating a filthy whore-house, as it stood in an isolated place, yet the hullabaloo in the place affected the peaceful life of the civilized inhabitants nearby. My friend had to use power, armed force and aid to abusive words and law, so as to achieve the same.

He was astonished to see a face there, a sweet placid face of a woman...He had seen her here and there before, but this was the last place where he hoped her to belong to...His surprise gave way to hatred and anger. He whacked her on her face and after an array of abuses, seeing her son uncontrollably saying she had no other escape, no other way to resort to, to earn her living, he felt an interminable pity  towards the abominable situation that she was in.

Being a committed person to the social interest and well-being, he promised to save her from the kind of abhorred life she wa leading, but asked her to make a promise that she will never return to such a life again. Thus when al the rest of the arraigned lots were arrested and taken to the police station, she was released -- free to live her life once more -- a chance to correct her mistakes and live a new life. My friend had an intuition that she would survive, and would return to the respectable strata  the society in course of time. In his view, his words have opened her eyes and made her regret for her sins. Also it was a second birth, and a new phase of life that she was going to lead. He was optimistic or even quite over confident about the outcome.

Later after many months, he saw her again. Time was about 10.30  at night. My friend was eatin, with his friends at a motel. He saw her coming from behind a huge building, hiding in the shadows of the night. Her eyes flickered in the sight of a familiar face. He asked her about life, when she answered that she has totally given up that unworthy profession. She is into manual labour. But she did not have a. Ouse to live in, or a speck of land as asset. So she spends her night in such places, like the verandah of shops, the spaces behind big buildings etc. She said with desperation lining her eyes, that once fallen into this profession, escape is difficult. Because she was a whore in the eyes of the public and she is perceived by others, as a public property. She spoke to him about how society condemned her, when she tried to abstain from being illicit, and how they dragged her back to what she was.

" I tried my best sir, made the effort as the best as I can, to live like a normal woman in the society, accepted and respected. I am still trying. I am trying how long I can hold on".

There was nothing else that my friend could do at this juncture, so he smiled helplessly at her.There are always limits to our strivings when it comes to the scenario of helping others.

For quite some time, he did not see her again. Later, once as he was speeding on his bike, with his friend, his eyes fell on a very familiar face, walking through the road. He stopped, and saw that it was she, so lean and tired. There was a man with her, whom she introduced to him as her husband. He saw her passing something to the man, as he approached her in the bike. When asked what it was, she didn't give a clue. Taking the packet by force, he found that it was opium. He also gathered that both of them were drunk. On further enquiries it was evident that the man with her was not her husband. Out of desperation, my friend asked her many more questions in animus rage. For which she answered:
" Onnu po saare, leave me alone. It is my life".
And holding hands they walked away. My friend followed his gaze, till they disappeared in the horizon.

There are many things, which deserves to be changed, but cannot be changed, much because our lives are also tuned by the invisible but powerful strings of the society which moulds it's inhabitants mostly to the way the majority needs it to be. Once fallen into the depths of this oblivion, there is, for sure, no come back...ever...

Guest Hosting Etiquettes

Today I had to play the role of an entertaining host...There were many guests, from the family circle who came to visit me.

The art of guest hosting requires a lot of compromises...you wud hav to forsake a lot of your conventions say, the ppl who come to see u are brought up in different backgrounds and wud have a lifestyle entirely different from yours....u wud hav to compromise with the etiquettes and manners dat you are used to,  to treat them well.

The greatest trouble was, my little one watching these scenes with wide open eyes. Seeing the guest putting her legs on the sofa was quite a wonder to him. Perplexed, he asked: "Amma, u always scold me when I put my legs on sofa. Now y are u keeping mum. Here, scold aunty".
My face turned pale, not only bcoz he was breaking the unwritten rules of hospitality but also bcoz I lacked words so as to explain it to him before the guests. I turned pale, and gazed at my husband for help. For him it was simple. He gave a scorching look at the kid and a growl..."Go and play. What are kids doing here where elders r talking".

However even after the guests left, I kept on thinking about this.  What wud hav been the best way to save the situation? How shud I hav explained it to the kid, with credibility and without hurting the feelings of our guests. Or was it that, like Shakespeare says...Life is a drama and we are at times entitled to add some drama to some of our daily life situations like what my hubby did...